[Reflection] Living a Relationship-Centered Life
I just got back from spending about two weeks in Mayapur, India, the city where the Hare Krishna movement formally started in the early 16th century, and now upon returning to the United States a couple days ago, I’ve been reflecting on what it is that really defines the Hare Krishna movement. This reflection has led me to ponder more broadly: what are the things that define life itself?
Upon thinking of this question I am reminded of something that happened to me in September of last year. I was in Gainesville, Florida, swimming with some of my friends at one of my favorite spots, Poe Springs. I am especially fond of Poe Springs because it has a rope swing that one can use to swing into the Ichetucknee River. I remember going off to the swing and being delighted that there was nobody there using it. I went up to it and began to swing and jump into the river by myself while the rest of my friends were swimming somewhere else in the spring. After using it about five or six times, I began to feel bored and this surprised me greatly. How could it be that I am no longer enjoying being on the rope swing? How could it get old so quickly?
It occurred to me that life in general is like this. Without our relationships, our friends, parents, partners, acquaintances, and even the strangers we interact with, life would seem empty and strange. Of course, solitude is healthy and necessary to live a balanced life, but it is extremely rare that someone wants to avoid people and relationships entirely. In different aesthetic and philosophical schools of thought originating in the Indian subcontinent, such as the Hare Krishna tradition, this exchange of relationships is known as rasa, which simultaneously means “taste,” “juice,” or “essence.” Leaving the two alimentary definitions aside, the idea of rasa as essence is very interesting to consider.
In Hare Krishna theology, rasa is considered to be the the substance of what makes life worth living- the relationships that we hold with other people are ultimately the strongest driving forces that we have in our lives which influence our choices and experiences more than anything else in this world. Intuitively, to me, at least, this idea seems very reasonable and logical. And if this is the case, then the weight of our relationships with each other shouldn’t be under emphasized. A modern saint, Tamal Krishna Goswami, says in a lecture from 2000 to his audience: “actually, most of what we need [to grow spiritually] is sitting right in this room” in reference to the audience and the significance of their relationships with each other. If we could really learn how to love each other, care for each other, to sincerely seek out help and refuge from each other, we wouldn’t need anything else.
Whether it is with a teacher, a friend, a family member, or a stranger, each person we interact with holds valuable life lessons, perspectives, and opportunities for positive interaction that shouldn’t be ignored. If relationships are the sum and substance of our lives, if rasa is really what is driving us forward, what are we doing to take advantage of our relationships with each other?